Self-Disclosure

dis·clo·sure [dih-skloh-zher]  

noun: the act or an instance of disclosing; exposure; revelation.

For the type of scholarship essays which I have been discussing on this blog, especially the Gilman essay, self-disclosure is the most important, and the most difficult, concept to keep in mind. As its definition implies, disclosure involves both exposure and revelation. Disclosing personal, often-times private information about yourself can be very tough, especially when you are being asked to share this information with perfect strangers, and to put it in writing.

First, it is important for me to note that while the concept is one that I have been discussing with students for some time, my using of the phrase “self-disclosure” is actually inspired by training workshops and webinars provided by IIE that I have attended in preparation for my Gilman advising role. The folks at IIE are very emphatic about the importance of self-disclosure in the Gilman essay. I want to reiterate this emphasis and also expand it to include all other scholarship essays.

What do I mean when I say “self-disclosure?”

Many scholarship programs are established with specific goals in mind. For example, our Learning Abroad Merit Scholarship here at the University of Utah aims to support students with strong academic records and evidence of thoughtful preparation for their learning abroad experience. Or, for another example, the Gilman scholarship aims to diversify the types of students who are studying abroad and the places to which they go.

But how does a scholarship program reach such goals, which are often abstract and wide-ranging? How does a scholarship program determine that a student is diverse, or that a student has thoughtfully prepared for his/her program? Some qualities, like racial background or previous coursework, may be visible to scholarship programs on student profiles, systemically collected data, or transcripts. However, many qualities are not. This is where it becomes important for the student applicant to tell the scholarship program about his/herself. Self-disclosure, then, refers to the process of determining which of your qualities, characteristics, and experiences a scholarship program may be interested in, and then sharing those qualities and experiences with the selection committee in the form of a personal essay.

Why is self-disclosure so difficult?

There are a couple factors that make writing a good self-disclosing essay pretty tricky:

1)      Identifying what it is that you should be disclosing:

Problem: What does the scholarship selection committee want to know about me?

Solution: First, I recommend that you take a close look at the mission statement or description of the scholarship. Note the goals of the scholarship program, the priority selection factors and the underlying motivation behind the program. This will help you determine which types of students that particular scholarship is looking to support. See my post “What and for Whom?” for further help with this process. Then, make a list of different qualities and experiences that you have which make you that student. Brainstorm and be creative with this list—not everything on your list has to end up in your essay…this is just to get you thinking, warmed up. We will discuss tips for writing the essay in a moment.

Common pitfalls: In relation to this issue of self-disclosure, students tend to gravitate to one extreme or the other. Typically, students either under-share or over-share; you want to avoid both! Remember, the scholarship selection committee will never know all those wonderful and unique things about you UNLESS YOU TELL THEM! And, also remember: no scholarship selection committees are looking to read long sob stories, nor do they want to learn every nitty-gritty detail about your life. Pick and choose what you share carefully. See my post “Do This” for more helpful hints.

2)      Disclosing in a tasteful, effective manner:

Problem: It’s harder than it sounds to share personal information about yourself in a way that is productive and appealing to your audience. Often, students feel shy, embarrassed or petty for sharing touchy or private information. Often, my students tell me that they feel “weird” or “awkward” writing about their struggles, disadvantages, successes or unique attributes.  I also have had many students tell me that they don’t have anything unique or special to share (so not true!).

Solution: Use that brainstorming list that you made to your advantage—the best place to start your essay is with a strong list of qualities and experiences that demonstrate your appropriateness for the scholarship. Writing about obstacles that you have encountered and overcome, or achievements that you have made may feel uncomfortable, but this is what most scholarship committees actually want to read about—they want a chance to get to know you and to read about why you are a good fit for them. As you write, pay close attention to the length requirements/restrictions for the essay. These will give you a good indication of how long, how in-depth, how detailed your essay should be. Keep your language professional, avoid overly emotional language, and stay focused on the larger picture that you want to paint with your essay.

Common Pitfalls: While your readers want to get to know you and all of your unique experiences, they are not looking to read the next great autobiography. Keep things short and simple. Also, remember that overly emotional, sappy or aggressive language can be a real turn-off. To avoid using this stuff, keep your audience in mind; imagine that you are writing this essay for a potential employer, or for one of your professors. Just because your essay contains personal details, does not mean that you should use intimate, emotional or overly casual language. On the flip side, many students are too reserved or hesitant when writing these essays, once again keep in mind that YOU have to be the one to share details with your readers if you want them to know something about you.

Take away lessons:

As you write, keep the goals of the scholarship program in mind.

If you want your readers to know something about you, tell them!

Keep your language succinct, professional and avoid overly emotional language.

Don’t over share.

Don’t under share.

Stay calm, and have someone you trust read your essay for you before you submit it.

Do This!

Ten bits of advice that will improve any scholarship essay

10. Start with a bang. You’ve heard of a “hook” or an “attention grabbing device” for the beginnings of songs or speeches. The same concept applies here; make sure that your reader is awake and attentive and giving your essay the lively consideration that it deserves.

 9. End with something powerful or profound. Again, you do not want to be dramatic, but you want to leave the reader with a little gem that will stick with her as she moves on to the next essay. You want the reader’s thoughts to keep returning to YOU.

8. Carefully consider your audience. Who will be reading your essay? How many applications is that reader likely to read? What are his/her motivations?

7. Style is vital. While your scholarship essay should not be as stiff and impersonal as an academic paper, you do not want it to be too abstract, or too colloquial. Unless the scholarship application asks specifically for a letter, do not address your essay directly to the reader.

6. Pay careful attention to the flow and organization of your essay. You want to create a seamless and cohesive reading experience for your readers. Remember that stuff they taught you in writing 101: introduction, paragraph transitions and conclusions!

5. This is your chance to introduce yourself; think of your essay as an on-paper interview.

4. Avoid the drama. Avoid the biography. Include personal details that are succinct and relevant to the point at hand. You want to share your individuality without overwhelming, boring or alienating your reader.

3. Do not be shy. If you have accomplishments, challenges or burdens which are helping or hindering your educational experience, share them. No one will know otherwise, and scholarships are often awarded to students with the most unique accomplishments or the most difficult challenges.

2. ANSWER THE PROMPT! Ask yourself constantly as you write and edit your essay, “Am I responding to the question(s) asked of me? How is this relevant?”

1. Be creative. Be original. You don’t want to submit an essay that your reader has already seen 100 times.

What and for Whom?

Gilman Statement of Purpose Essay: Understanding your audience and their goals

As is the case for any essay, it is vital that you understand your audience and the goals of the Gilman scholarship before you begin writing.

So…what are the goals of the Gilman scholarship program?

As stated on their website, The Benjamin A. Gilman scholarship is a program which “broadens the student population that studies abroad by supporting undergraduates who might not otherwise participate due to financial constraints.” Further, “The Gilman Scholarship Program aims to support students who have been traditionally under-represented in study abroad, including but not limited to, students with high financial need, community college students, students in under-represented fields such as the sciences and engineering, students with diverse ethnic backgrounds, and students with disabilities. The program seeks to assist students from a diverse range of public and private institutions from all 50 states, Washington, DC and Puerto Rico.”

What this means for you is that you need to keep the notions of diversity, financial constraints, underrepresented populations in mind as you write your statement of purpose.

What this does not mean for you is that you should not apply if you are not a member of a group which is traditionally considered underrepresented. You may just need to be a little creative.

When your readers (we will get to them in a minute) score your statement of purpose essay, they are first and foremost looking for you to tell them WHY you fit the goals of the Gilman program. You can be a good fit in a variety of ways: you may be from a diverse or underrepresented ethnic background, have a disability, attend a community college, or a historically minority-serving institution. You could be from an underrepresented state or traveling to a non-traditional destination. Maybe you are studying a critical needs language or are a student of science, technology, engineering or math. Whatever your qualifying aspects are, just remember that those must be the focus of your statement of purpose.

So…who is my audience?

The panel reading and reviewing your application will be comprised of International Education professionals. This may include professors or faculty, advisors, and administrators. Given this audience, there are a few important things to keep in mind:

• These people know A LOT about study abroad. They are familiar with many programs, destinations, and have more often than not been on study abroad programs themselves.
  • So what? : You don’t need to sell your reader on the merits of study abroad in general. Rather, what you need to do is convince your reader that you have chosen the best program to fit your academic and professional goals.
  • These people are reading A LOT of essays in a short amount of time!
    • So what?: You want to clear, succinct, creative. You want to stand out, but only for your well-organized, and well-articulated essay (not for your quirks and grammatical mistakes!).
• These people are passionate about education, passionate about encouraging underrepresented students to go abroad.
  • So what?: They really do want to see that you fit the goals of the Gilman scholarship; they are not secretly hoping that you will divert into a story about your childhood pet or your passion for anime.